Thank you to a Guardian Angel
Saying goodbye to my mum was the saddest of any tasks I’ve had to face during this Covid crisis. Yes, she of the dancing shoes, high heels and sparkling dresses, has left us. She was funny, nowhere near as prim and proper as she appeared and the master of the disparaging look.
Am I like her? It is not for me to say. Aren’t we all a little like our mothers?
I did not take after her for dancing, nor for singing but my creative talents do come from her and my grandmother. Both talented ladies, painted and sewed a fine seam and my grandmother wrote many short stories that she published in a journal for the family.
My artistic talents, my skills as a seamstress and perhaps my entire writing career, can be traced back to the genes I inherited from my mother’s side of the family. So, thank you for those Mum!
When I began writing this blog more than ten years ago, my mother often featured in my posts. Some of those posts were funny, some nostalgic and some thought provoking. As I have already said, this is the saddest of times. She was 94 (I am almost 95, Debbie,) and still had most of her wits about her, even if her memory was letting her down towards the end.
She had come through the Second World War, her stories fascinating, given birth to four children, losing two of those before their time and she had born widowhood bravely, finding solace in her dancing and finding a new partner who my younger children knew as Granddad. Outliving three partners, my father being the love of her life, she entered her 95th year, excited to be looking at the prospect of moving nearer to us, yet not willing to give up her home and the people who visited her regularly, whom she had come to regard as good friends.
I am grateful I was able to spend time with her towards the end, when so many could not be with their loved ones during the pandemic. I held her hand and laughed with her one more time before she went.
Restrictions still apply and the funeral will be small. No singing, chanting or blowing of musical instruments will be allowed, we have been told. I was not going to take my Clarinet in any case (not that I own one).
So, with a poignant final farewell, I can’t help wondering if that Guardian Angel who sat with my mother for all those weeks, really did come to help her on her way after all.
I find myself hoping that it really was so.
Debbie
I am an Author, wife to one, mother to five and grandmother to six. I live in the English countryside in Hampshire, UK, with my husband and two dogs and am a non exec Director for Glow www.theglowstudio.com.
8 Comments
Deb
Oh, Debbie, I am so sorry to hear this. This pic of you and your mom makes me smile – so full of joy and mischief and life. May your grief be full of grace and hands to hold yours. Sending you love.
Debbie
Thank you Deb, your words are lovely and appreciated, as always. X
Jess
Such lovely words about your mum Debbie. I’m sure she loved having you so close at the end. I’m so sorry for yours and the family’s loss. Lots of love to you all xxx
Debbie
Thank you Jess X
patricia60
Yesterday I was allowed to meet my first grandson – What joy! Today I read about your loss, which makes me sad. Thank you for sharing her story and your together story. I am sure that Guardian Angel was right there and guiding her spirit along now. Good grief to you and yours…you have shared your sorrow with gracious, lovely words. We are all too now at beginnings.. a grandee and a life without. With love and well wishes for you and all your family
Debbie
Congratulations on the birth of your first Grandson, Patricia! (My mother’s name was Patricia too by the way.) It is hard to say goodbye but good to know that her Guardian Angel is with her. It helps to write when we feel sad but there is also so much joy still to be had. 🙂 XX
Graham Barker
So sorry for your loss Debbie, a great loss, your words were fantastic & reflected your mum.
Our thoughts are with you & all your family. All our love Graham
Debbie
Thank you Graham XXX