“My Hero” by Flossie

Hi all, Flossie here. I thought it about time I put in an appearance. It would seem that the Boss has been hogging the keyboard for far too long.

Not only did she disappear for a couple of weeks, leaving us to cope alone, but she has also been writing about it since she got back with nary a mention of yours truly!

There have been quite a few changes round here since I last wrote. Not least is the appearance of ‘Eddie’ (new kid on the block). I haven’t met Eddie properly yet because apparently, I am too boisterous for a tiny pup. I don’t know where they get this idea from, Doris was a pup when I met her – admittedly, she was already built like a tank and Eddie is, well, from what I have seen through the window, Eddie is on the small side. He belongs to the Boss’s eldest son and has visited just once so far.

This visit coincided with a visit from one of the little humans who is now crawling round the place and pulling himself up so that he is almost as tall as me.

I observed them all through the patio window as Eddie raced around and around as though running on long-life batteries.

I confess that just watching him made me tired.

As for Doris, now that one has grown too big for her boots to be sure! She is now as broad and as sturdy as she is likely to get and sometimes, between you and me, she is just a little too boisterous for me. I have to admit, she is as gentle as a lamb with little William though, her tiny human.

I haven’t seen as much of my four legged cousins recently so have had to make do with my woodland friends.

Today, The Boss takes Ol’ Keano and me to the nice part of the woods, the part where all the water and the best smells are.

Here we are, sauntering along, minding our own business when, Poof! Out of the trees comes Ellie. Now, Ellie is a large, two year old, German Shepherd. Ellie greets Keano with a cursory sniff and Keano ignores her. I would love to do the same but am not afforded the same courtesy.

Having spotted Ellie, I shrink back behind a tree and hope she wont notice me until she and her owner have passed.

The Boss is greeting Ellie’s owner and laughing away at something or other. Meanwhile, I am cowering behind a bush, trying not to breathe.

Just as I think it safe to come out, Ellie spots me. She is here in a flash. I do that subservient thing of lying down and looking harmless. Sometimes this disarms Ellie and she leaves me alone. Not today. Today Ellie leaps in for the kill. Well, I exaggerate but then so might you if you had a great hairy monster jumping on top of you.

After a second or two, she backs off and just looks at me, daring me to move. Oh no, I am not going to fall for that old trick. One move and she’ll annihilate me!

I choose my moment carefully and roll over, playing dead. Ellie comes towards me and rather belatedly I think, her owner calls out,

“Oh Ellie, no, leave her alone!” Ellie glances across at her owner and then resumes her position of guarding me.

The Boss then does something completely ridiculous. She calls me. I mean, how can I possibly answer that call now?

The Boss then does something outrageous. She calls Ellie and you know what Ellie does? She trots over to My Boss and asks for a fuss. Unsure whether this will encourage Ellie to corner me in future, the boss pats her head while I take the opportunity to slink away into the trees. Has the Boss taken leave of her senses, getting friendly with that dog? I watch from a safe distance and Ellie goes to stand by her own owner who apologises profusely as she always does (this is a common event) and Keano suddenly appears (where were you, you old scoundrel when I needed you?)

The Boss and Ellie’s Boss, have been muttering things like,

“Oh, Ellie, no, poor Flossie,”

“She’s fine, don’t worry,” (that being my boss – how does she know I’m fine?)

With Keano between me and the devil dog, I am a little more daring and I walk back into the clearing. Ellie takes two steps towards me and Ol’ Keano, who can look quite menacing when he wants, turns and growls at her. Ellie thinks twice and runs back to her owner – hey, well done Keano! Maybe do that a little sooner next time eh?

The rest of the walk continues without incident, unless you count meeting up with Gimble, a large Labrador and his younger brother Gyer, (think Jabberwocky) and chasing round and round the trees, leaving the Boss and The Tess lady, clinging onto some spindly tree trunks lest one of us careers into them.

I have noticed something else about these walks of late too. The Boss seems to have found a way of keeping me away from the really deep, smelly water hole in the middle of the woods. We take the same route, we tread the same paths but then, somewhere along the way, the Boss makes a subtle detour and we miss the hole completely. There is plenty of other water around of course. Streams run throughout the woods and I make best use of them all to cool myself down but that hole, now that is something else – a particularly pungent treat! Alas, I have not yet worked out exactly what is going on but leave it with me. I will I am sure.

As we walk back to the car, I see Ellie emerge from the woods some way away. Aha, she is on her lead! Keano sees her too and stops to give her a look that says,

“Don’t mess with me or mine,”

I stare back at her smugly before jumping into the open boot and wiping my paws on the towel the Boss has so thoughtfully laid there.

Keano, my hero!